The Next Step

It feels like it's been a long time since I've written even thought it's only been a week.  I've been enjoying time with my family who have been visiting from Florida. This was also a crazy week due to our annual dance recital. Still holding at my 47 pounds lost but that's fine since I've been a little lax on my exercising this week. Between the family visit, prepping for recital and the weather being hotter than 50 Shades of Grey, I missed my walks and just didn't have it in me to hop onto the eliptical.  Truth be told I just wanted to enjoy my late nights hanging with my brother knowing that once he left, exercise will still be there.

Recital this weekend was amazing and our annual afterparty was a blast and yes, I even enjoyed a small piece of cake.  Today it was back on the wagon, need to get those 3 pounds off as quickly as possible so I can hit the 50 pound mark.

Got home from work tonight and got back into the routine of walking.  As I walked, I started thinking about the next step and how I'm going to lose the next 50 pounds.  I've gotten used to portion control, there is still room for improvement of what I eat but that will come, I've started a regular exercise routine but it only consists of the eliptical and walking, eventually I'll join a gym.

So I was walking and thinking and I started thinking about running and jogging. I decided to give jogging a try.  I tried it and I loved it.  I couldn't believe that I was actually jogging.  I paced myself by doing some walking, then jogging, then walking and then jogging again.  And I couldn't believe that I enjoyed it.

The only thing I can compare it to is someone who is paralyzed and is told they will never be able to walk again only to put their mind to it and work so hard to prove that they can do it. The day they actually take those steps is amazing.  That's how I felt. 

I had never jogged in my entire life.  Remember, I'm the girl who is athletically challenged.  This may seem like such a small thing to some but to someone like me who has been overweight for so many years and who has never participated in any kind of exercise, this alone is a huge accomplishment.

 Bigger yet is that I actually did this in public.  I've always been so worried about what people think about me and what they think when they look at me and tonight, I didn't care, I felt so awesome.

Holy S#$T

I love seeing peoples reactions to my weight loss, especially people I haven't seen in a long time.  My favorite reaction has got to be the Holy S#$T reaction.  Cracks me up every time.  It usually starts out with oh my god, you look amazing, how much have you lost..when I reveal (which i'm more than happy to do so)..it's followed by Holy S#$T!  It's priceless.  I can't wait to see the reactions when I hit the 100 pound mark!

Persistance and the Pedometer

New England Weather is a pain in the ass. Beautiful one day, cold and rainy the next.  It's been very difficult to get into my walking routine thanks to Mother Nature.  I absolutely love to walk, I can change my my route at anytime. I can walk whenever it fits into my schedule. It's Free (though i'm sure at some point I will need to join a gym).  I actually get disappointed when I can't walk.

This weekend was absolutely beautiful. Thank you Mother Nature!  So I made sure that no matter what my days brought, I was going for my walk. I changed my route on both days this weekend just to mix it up a bit.  Saturday's walk was good but because I changed my route and part of my route included the bike path I had no way to track how many miles I did.

Sunday, I made it a priority to get a pedometer.  Changed up the route again, drove to the park and ride and picked up the bike path at a different spot walked 4 miles total. Very glad I have that pedometer now. 

My regular walk has been 3 miles so I was thrilled to have upped it a bit.

My persistance with the walking has paid off....I stepped onto the scale this morning and was hoping to see a pound gone...imaginge my surprise when it told me I lost 3 pounds!!!

Excited doesn't describe it.  That brings my total to 47 pounds.  Only 3 more to go to reach my half way mark.

Now to keep my fingers crossed that the weather stays consistent for me.

Pictures

Being overweight, I never liked having my picture taken.  I would rather be the person taking the photos than the person in the photos.  This is a sad thing because I've missed out being in some fun photo ops with family and friends.  With my recent weight loss I'm seeing that this is starting to change a little bit.  I'm still not at the most comfortable point where I want to be in every photo. I'm still very careful about which photos I let out in public but there have been more and more of me poppping up that I approve of. 

Sometimes I look at the photo and say Wow, look at what I've accomplished and other times, I look and say uugh, I still have a long way to go and oh my god, If I look like that now  what on earth did I look like before.  Well that question was recently answered when a friend of mine showed me a photo she had taken about 6 years ago and compared it to one taken more recently. I was completely astonished at what I looked like.  It made me happier than ever that I've embarked on this new path.

The GAP

It's the little things that excite me. It really doesn't take much to make me happy.  For instance on the way to the Brad Paisley Concert yesterday my cousin and I stopped at Wrentham Outlets.  It was then that I realized I forgot a jacket. I thought for a moment that maybe I would pick up a sweatshirt of some sort for the show as it was chilly out.  I thought again and said maybe it won't be so bad, but I figured it was better safe than sorry.  It felt like rain and being freezing at an outdoor concert surely would put a damper on the evening.  My cousin said where on earth do you think you're going to find a jacket this time of year.  I thought...The GAP...don't they always have hoodies?

Now I have to tell you the thought of walking into The GAP to buy a sweatshirt really frightened me.  I've never bought anything for myself at The GAP. I've never been able to fit into anything there.  As much as I've seen the numbers drop on the scale and I do see changes and yes, I've bought smaller clothes...I still look in the mirror and see what I used to look like. So just the thought of walking into a "normal" store makes my blood pressure go up.

I was brave, I went into that store went to the hoodie section and picked one up; put it up against me and saw that it would clearly fit.  I was so excited.  Remember, it is the little things that make me happy.

Original price was 40.00. It was on SALE!!!  I got it for 23.00. Do you know that I've never owned a hoodie of my very own? I could never fit in them properly. 

So, I bought my very own hoodie for a great price at a store that I never could shop in before. I was a happy, happy girl.  Turns out it was a good decision because it was very cold at the concert.  And the concert was most excellent.

I was thinking. . .

I was thinking. . . a dangerous thing, I know, but as I stepped on the scale this morning and was happy to see another 2 pounds gone (down 44 total) I realized that with all the things that have changed so far and the future changes that will come there are things about me that will not change.

So far this adventure has been fun and positive and we've all seen the physical changes start to appear. I've changed my eating habits drastically.  But in the end there will be things that won't change. I may be  changing habits and improving my appearance but what's on the inside will never change.  Yes through this process I may gain a little more self confidence but a promise that I will make to myself is that I will never forget my struggle to get to my goal. I will remain true to myself.  I've witnessed all too often people that have tasted success in their life, be it through their jobs or other avenues only to change who they are and forget where they come from.

I will always remember that this is a difficult journey for anyone no matter if they have 5 pounds or 100 pounds to lose.  I will always have an open heart and an open mind.  I will always stay true to myself and to what I believe in. 

Happy June 1st. . . Can't wait to see what this month brings!